Ok here s the real me like it or not. At this moment I am mad as hell, mad at my body mad at the way I feel mad at what is going on in my life right now. I feel trapped in my body, Trying to find the real me. The fighter the one who never lets things get to me.
I am always expected to b the strong one well right now I am weaker than I like tears roll so eaily,WHY can I fight for everyone but me.
I need to find my strength again I know I have it in me just pulling it back out.
The best way to describe the way I am feeling is I feel like a POW I am a prisoner of a war that I never wanted to be in that I have been rejecting for years now the truth has come up and smacked me in the head and left me spinning out of control
I need to get grounded again and find a way to accept what is and what can be again I can’t give up but why is it I can fight for everyone but fighting for myself is so difficult? Am I not the same as everyone else why can’t I let myself be? Why do I feel like I am in mourning over something that was not promised to me , I HAVE MS YES I HAVE MS IT MAKES ME WEAK IT MAKES ME MAD I HAVE TO FIGHT, FIGHT FOR ME AND FIGHT FOR YOU AND FIGHT TO FEEL HUMAN ONECE AGAIN AND NOT LIKE A WALKING TALKING DISEASE…. THIS IS A FIGHT I CAN NOT LOOSE I HAVE WAY TO MUCH TO LIVE FOR.
MAYBE MY KIDS CANT HANDLE IT AND HAVE WALKED AWAY FROM ME BEVCAUSE I HAVE MS AND THEY CAN’T OR WONT UNDERSTAND BUT I HAVE TO FIGHT FOR ME NOW,WHEN THEY CAN FIND THE LOVE IN THEIR HEARTS FOR ME THEN FINE BUT UNTIL THEN I WILL FIGHT FOR ME ,I WILL FIGHT TO GET STRONGER TO FIGHT FOR MY HUSBAND AND NOT WITH HIM. NO MORE PITY PARTY FOR ME ,I WILL FIGHT I HAVE TO IT’S MY LIFE AND MY HEART THAT HAS TO GO ON LIKE THIS
HELLO WORLD THIS IS MARIE MEYER MS FIGHTER ….I WILL SURVIVE …YET AN OTHER VISIOUSE KICK FROM THIS DAMNED DISEASE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!