Disability is a big part of my life, and yet I don’t want it to become my identity. This can be difficult since much of my daily life Is thinking about and planning for my disability. I am more than cerebral palsy, but it does shape who I am. It’s a confusing place to be when you don’t know how to feel. I am passionate about advocacy and writing but that usually revolves around disability and I want to be more, and make something more of my life. Not to say that those things are bad and we don’t need advocacy. I just feel that I should be doing more, or maybe I just never feel like I’m doing enough. It’s difficult to not feel that limitation. Having a positive outlook on life will not eliminate my disability or the circumstances I am in. I’m working toward my bachelor's in psychology but I’m starting to wonder if I can actually do that work in a job setting. I’m anxious and scared because in fact my whole life does seem controlled by my condition. Lately, I just don’t know how to feel which is why I haven’t had the motivation to write blogs, but hate having such little money. I feel so stuck with no way to escape. I know this feeling means that I have a lot of work to do on myself. I have been trying to work on my faith journey and that’s what I have to carry me through at this point. The Lord knows the plans he has for me, and even if you’re not religious, you have a purpose too. A few reminders for you all
1. Being unproductive doesn’t mean you less of a person 2. Mental illness is not your fault 3. You are worthy of happiness 4. You are doing great, keep going.
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